Posted in Cancer, Crochet, Daily Life, Family, tagged Cancer, Catholic, crochet, Family, Jim, Non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma, Real life, Work on Friday, July 22, 2016|
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I have quite a bit of news, both life and faith related. However, I will keep the two separate and update on the faith part in another post.
There are some significant changes taking place in my life at the moment. Firstly, and I suppose most importantly, my mum has been diagnosed with Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma. She has chosen not to have any aggressive treatment and has opted for palliative care only, I totally respect her decision as it’s not something you can decide for someone else. I understand why she’s chosen this path, I don’t think chemotherapy is for everyone, it can be worse than the disease it’s trying to cure in some cases. So, good for her on knowing what she wants and bravely going for it!
My relationship with my mother has been very strained since the death of my lovely step-father Jim, back in 2009. We were fairly close up until then, but she has never been easy to love if I’m honest and that became a lot more difficult after Jim’s death. I think he somehow kept us together and calmed the waters between us when he was alive but when he died that soothing balm went with him. I had kind of hoped that she would mellow a bit with this latest news and build a few bridges but, despite my offered olive branch, that has not happened. She knows I’m here if she needs me but as it stands that’s as close as I’m allowed. Some things you just have to place into God’s hands and trust that He knows what’s best.
Secondly, Ethan [who is about to turn 11!!!!] has just left primary school. He attended a fantastic Catholic Primary School here in Milton Keynes, and they became like family by the end. Yesterday was his very last day and to say it was emotional is an understatement. So many tears from staff, students and parents alike. From my point of view it was also the end of an era; for the last 33 years I’ve been a parent to at least one child of primary school age or under. I have to admit to feeling rather bereaved at the loss of that status. There has to be a time to move on but it’s a hard habit to break and I’m sad at its passing.
I am still not working having given up my job as a Teaching Assistant back in December ’15. However, once I’ve got Ethan settled into secondary school I will start to re-assess things. I’d really like something part-time that gives me time with Ethan in the holidays as I won’t leave him on his own all day yet. I’m not keen to go back into a school full-time but if anything part-time comes up then I’ll probably go for it. Finances dictate that I’m probably going to have to earn something within the next year or so, barring a lottery win. I may sign-up for supply work which will mean I can choose when and where I work. For now it’s in God’s hands and I’m trying to remain open and just see what comes along in the next few months.
My crochet has been badly neglected recently. Just too much going on with the huge amount of end-of-term activities that goes with being the mother of a Year 6 student, visits to the new secondary school and organising uniform/equipment/bus passes etc., hospital appointments with mum and the general demands of a family and a house that still refuses to clean itself.
That is about it for the ‘life’ part of my news. I will do a ‘faith’ update very soon.
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I’ve saved this post to the end of the day because it’s a sad one really, and I like my blog to be a happy, love-filled, creative space but however…… Today is the fifth [yes, I can’t quite believe it either] anniversary of our dear Jim’s death. It doesn’t feel like five years, it’s gone very fast from my perspective.
I don’t dread this anniversary anymore, it’s become a day of reflection and fond memories with a twinge of ‘homesickness’ for those strong arms and big heart. It also nearly always falls during Lent which, for me as a Catholic woman, really helps; giving me something to draw on at a time of heightened faith on this journey to the cross and then onto hope in our Risen Lord.
Below is the photo’ I posted all those years ago . . .I miss him so much. . .
Jim on his 66th birthday, March 2009.
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